In giving, we receive
“It’s the quiet ones ya got to look out for.”
Andrew lunged for the window after a depressing tale of how the world was against him. I sprang to my feet and wrestled him to the floor. The doctor, my supervising psychiatrist, later asked me why did I react? Pointing out that the window was too small for him to fit through, the patient’s action was a call for attention. While the world pushed back hard with this patient, he had not come to terms with his reality, opting for the sugar-coated substitute of clinical care over a genuinely caring friend.
Several weeks later, Andrew was on the clinic’s roof, five stories below were the fire department and hundreds of spectators he craved so much. A scenario that would repeat itself throughout his long life.
But Tom was a different, soft-spoken, amiable, and likable. I had agreed to accept his calls if he ever needed to talk. An expert mechanic with a sharp sense of humor, I looked forward to spending time with him. He recently committed to ending his addiction to cocaine with the prompting of a loving female companion. So when he called with some “Bad News” I was very alarmed. Tom had been cleaning his apartment and found a large stash of Coke in the fridge, which he had previously forgotten. He was so disturbed by its presence he was considering overdosing to end the pain.
He stayed out of the kitchen until I arrived when he showed me the stash. I assured him that there were people in his life that did not want to attend his funeral at this time in his life. He took the foil-wrapped stash and walked it to the bathroom, where he flushed it down the toilet.
I assured him one day at a time we would be there for each other and anyone else who came into our circle who needed to maintain a commitment to clean living.
A spiritual bond grew out of the early days of that relationship. We had the opportunity to intervene in many people’s lives with similarly positive outcomes. We found strength in numbers. Talk can be cheap, but it can also be a foundation for the difference between life and death.
Our lives went in different directions however I learned that he had given up auto mechanics to become a high school counselor. Tom began to understand that the pain of life pales by the joy of sharing hope with someone in trouble.
As I get older, my life contains significantly less drama, but I still find abundant joy in being generous whenever possible.